Baycrest

Baycrest - End of Life Volunteer Manual 53 Pre-occupation with the Deceased: The bereaved person may try to think of other things but finds themselves unable to shift their mind from thoughts about the deceased. This is normal. Physical Distress: Symptoms such as tightness in the throat, shortness of breath or a hollow feeling in the stomach. Hostile Reactions: People who are grieving often display a disconcerting loss of warmth in relationships and a tendency to respond with irritability and anger. Guilt: There is always some sense of guilt in grief. The bereaved think of the many things that they felt they could have or should have done, but didn't. They accuse themselves of negligence. If there was any unresolved anger with the person who died, the bereaved person will feel guilty. Depression: People may feel there is nothing to live for and that nothing seems worthwhile. They feel helpless/hopeless. Withdrawal: People who are grieving often withdraw from social relationships and they sometimes find normal daily routines are disrupted. Re-entering Relationships: Over time, the person readjusts to their new environment (without the person who has died) and forms new routines and relationships. HELPING PEOPLE MANAGE THE STAGES OF GRIEF The role of the volunteer is to be there when the grieving person wants to talk. Volunteers will listen and may hear the same fears, emotions and stories over and over again. The repetition is part of integrating the past with the present, remembering and saying good- bye. As a volunteer, it's okay to show your emotions. If you're at ease showing how you feel, it can make it easier for the person who is grieving. • Help the person who is grieving: • Express their pain and sorrow, and talk about their feelings of love, guilt and hostility

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